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 Jokes voor tijdens de examens

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Aantal berichten : 36
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Registration date : 01-04-08

BerichtOnderwerp: Jokes voor tijdens de examens   do jun 19, 2008 7:34 pm

A cop stops his patrol car when he sees a couple sitting on the curb. The guy is laying on his side with his pants pulled down, the girl has her finger in his ass-hole, and she's reaming away with a vengeance.
The cop says, "What the hell is going on here?"
The girl says, "This is my date. When I told him I wouldn't spend the night with him, he started pouring down the booze.
Now, he's too drunk to drive me home, so I'm trying to sober him up by making him puke."
The cop says, "That's not gonna make him puke."
She says, "Yeah? Wait till I put this finger in his mouth."

Hillary fan
Not really knowing what a Hillary fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except one boy.
The teacher asked Johnny why he has decided to be different. Johnny says, "I'm not a Hillary fan."
The teacher says, "Why aren't you a Hillary fan?"
Johnny says, "I'm a George Bush fan."
The teacher asks why are you a George Bush fan?
The boy says, "Well, my mom's a George Bush fan and my dad's a George Bush fan, so I'm a George Bush fan!"
The teacher asks, "If your mom was a moron and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?"
Johnny replies, "That would make me a Hillary fan."

Two Kiwis are sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store.
As yet the store isn't ready...only a few shelves are set up.
One says to the other, "I bet any minute now some tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window and ask what we're selling."
No sooner are the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious bloke walks to the window, has a peek, and in a Aussie accent asks, "What're yer sellin' here MATE?"
One of the men replies, "We're selling assholes here mate."
Without missing a beat, the Aussie says, "Geez, you must have had a bloody good day, you've only got two left!"

Sperm count !!
Old people have problems that you haven't even considered yet!
An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."
The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, "Well, doc, it's like this first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an arm pit, and she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing.
The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?"
The old man replied, "Yep, none of us could get the jar open."
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